We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
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