white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
