I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from