I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
