so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
