Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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