he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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