if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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