Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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