he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Operation Purity has been aborted
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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