We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
