is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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