ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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