we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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