umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize