you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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