I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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