The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
The Olympian is in my bed
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
