Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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