med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
