the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
