would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
