Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
