Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
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