Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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