TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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