When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
