I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
