this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
