apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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