What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize