Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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