his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
