I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
