so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize