I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
