hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
