the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
