Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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