i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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