Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
as a side note pls kill me
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
