The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize