So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
