she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
