We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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