Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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