We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
