Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
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