i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
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