if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
