You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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